Aren’t our minds weird…?
Well, mine certainly is, anyway! I woke up early yesterday, at around 4.30am, and I lay awake contemplating stuff.
A week or so ago, we had been looking at a lovely house for sale online (we’ve been idly contemplating a move, but nothing seriously) and I had found myself in the vicinity a few days later so had driven over to have a look…
The house (an old school house) was lovely, but I really didn’t like the village – to me it had a strange feel and I didn’t know why; I just knew I didn’t like it. So I mentally crossed the house and the village from my list, and thought no more of it, until 4.30am yesterday…
Why didn’t I like this village? It seemed on the face of it perfectly lovely – rural, with a good community feel to it… so what was it about?
I allowed my mind to drift over the question, with some curiosity. I imagined the aerial picture of the village, and saw it in my mind’s eye… and then I had a realisation – it was a straight road; the lane through the village had no bends in it, and the road just continued on after the village.
Now this may seem extremely unremarkable; indeed very many people clearly live in houses on straight roads that run through a village and out the other side, but to me, examining this possibility inside my mind, it felt “unsafe”… Now, my logical head says that’s weird… especially as I live on a straight lane at the moment…
My current house feels very safe to me, so what’s the difference? Well, it’s on a no-through road; you can’t just drive past and out at the other end. So what would make the school house ok for me? Obviously if it were on a side road that was a cul-de-sac, but also if there were some bends in the lane then that would make it better… how very odd. There is no logic to this at all; it’s just my own felt sense.
I asked John if he knew what I meant, and it was no surprise that he didn’t!
So I wonder if this is why islands feel so ‘safe’ to me? I suspect the answer is yes…
I know that environment has always been extremely important to me, and that where I live has to feel ‘special’ to me as well as ‘safe’ – but here was an interesting insight that I had never before considered, and without inquiry, I probably never would have.
Self-inquiry is such a valuable thing for us to do… to question ourselves over things… why did this interaction bother me, or why am I irritated by what that person does, and so on. Without awareness, we can’t create change; and if life is less than wonderful right now, then what change do we need to make?
Everything we do is in the service of meeting a need… often, we lack the insight to recocgnise what that need actually is. Through inquiry I was able to realise that some vital needs are met right here, and that I might have difficulty replicating them elsewhere; so for what purpose would I even want to try? There are lots of other thoughts and insights bubbling up around this, too, but I will leave those for another blog!
Now, here is a little invitation… I am running a course in September and October – a Certificate in Mindful Communication. It’s an eight week live online course, on Tuesday mornings, and we’ll have a deep dive into feelings, needs and connection with self and others. If you’re at all interested, please take a look at my website page: https://joanna-taylor.com/courses-workshops-retreats/certificate-in-mindful-communication/ and feel free to contact me if you’ve any questions.
In the meantime, have fun with your self-inquiry, and discovering just how weird your thoughts are!
